Dare I say it...

Molly's transition to preschool hasn't been easy...for her or for me. I know I'm having a hard time because she is. So many parent's that I have talked to with kids with disabilities, who have been in therapy or the hospital for an extended period of time have kids that will just go to anyone but not Molly and it's so odd to me because she has been around so many different people in her life. From her initial hospital stay, to at home nursing to Early Intervention and doctors appointments. I don't understand it. But she loves us and I'm not going to complain about that. It just makes it difficult on us because Jay and I haven't been out together in 2 years. I love being with Molly and it feels weird when I'm not with her but she has to get sick of us at some point, right?

Monday was really hard when I was dropping her off at school. Monday's are usually difficult because she has 4 days off of school. I've already been thinking about pulling her out. Maybe she's not ready, she is only 3. Maybe another year of just therapy and being a kid would do her some good. Maybe adding more days of school would help her adjust better. Maybe I need to talk to the teacher to get a better idea of what is going on in the classroom because all I see is a screaming child entering the school with tears rolling down her face, saying "bye" to me through the tears. So I decided to talk to her teacher and find out what was going on and to talk to her about the transition. I dropped her off on Monday and I swore that was going to be the last day. I sat in my car in the parking lot of the school trying not to lose it. I have done pretty well up to this point but I was so upset at how upset she was going into school. I talked to Jay about what we were going to do and said all of the above to him. When I picked Molly up she was much better. I spoke to the teacher and she said she had her best day yet. She was dancing, playing with the other kids, participated during circle time, etc. I expressed my concerns and she suggested adding a 3rd day because she is constantly being pulled out of class for therapies and she misses so much so that 3rd day will give her a class day without therapy. So we are going to try that when we come back from FL. This morning she walked with me up to the school instead of having me carry her. She cried when she saw the aide but by the time they got inside she was happy. So as long as I know she is happy once she's inside I'll have to live with that and just have my heart ripped out by her every morning. I hate that she's sad but now I'm starting to think she's just manipulating me : )

She is doing great with everything else. Her speech is coming along. She is making great progress and her therapist at rehab is so happy with her. She is walking all over the place, like she's been doing it her whole life. She doesn't want to sit still now. Yesterday I was taking the dogs out and when I came back she had dead bolted the door with her inside and I couldn't get in. I was banging on the door and trying to open it and she finally let me in. She's lucky she's cute!

That's all I have for now. We are leaving in 9 days for Disney but whose counting?! We are so excited but lots to do before we go!