Growing up too fast!

Yesterday was not only Valentine's Day but it was also Heart Awareness Day so I figured we would celebrate Molly's complicated, yet special heart by going to Build A Bear and building a heart teddy bear. I knew that Molly probably wouldn't have been all that into it but I figured she might be a little more than she was. The lady running the stuffing machine asked if I wanted to stuff the bear while she held Molly. First of all, I'm not letting someone I don't know and that hasn't purelled their hands hold Molly and second of all Molly would've lost her mind if I ever did that. So we just watched as she did it. We put the heart on the right side just like Molly, made the birth certificate and left. She wasn't impressed and hasn't touched the bear since we got it. Hopefully someday she'll appreciate the meaning behind it or not.

Today we had an appointment with the pediatrician. She did not wait to wait 6 months in between visits because usually kids are seen at 18 months and 24 months so we are going in 3 month intervals. It really annoys me because we have such a good handle on Molly if anything was going wrong we would bring her in to be seen. She gets a report from all of Molly's specialists so I really don't see the point but since I have nothing else to do (I'm being so sarcastic) we went. She weighed 21 lbs, 12 oz and is 30.31" long. She's almost as tell as we are. She a little above the 5th percentile for weight, 12th percentile for her head and I don't know where she is for her height. She didn't say, I didn't ask. I know she's small and it doesn't really matter to me where she is on the charts. We discussed her eating which she had nothing to add, we talked about her LADDS procedure which she said that she thinks we should combine with her trach site closure surgery in April and we talked about where she is developmentally. Nothing came out of this appointment except I found out how much she weighed and how long she was. Oh and she did tell me that even though the LADDS procedure is long and a serious surgery that her heart surgeries were so much worse. Thank you, captain obvious. I guess that was her attempt at making me feel better about doing the surgery.

We also found out last night that we are losing our secondary insurance. We have to apply each year for Molly. They pick up anything that our primary insurance doesn't cover. They also pay for her deductible, her formula, all of her meds, ER visits, and our insurance premium. Of course we are freaking out a bit because insurance for her is crucial. We no longer qualify because of our income which doesn't make sense because I only work part time this year. If we want to continue with this insurance we have to pay almost $200/month. We really don't have a choice and we'll figure it out but it just really sucks!!! It's not fair that there are people out there that abuse the system or that are drug addicts and they get approved but people like us that really need it don't qualify. It's just so wrong.

But as I sit here and listen to Molly fling her toys across the room, laugh at her TV show and "talk" to the Mickey Mouse characters when they ask a question none of this matters. We have been through worse and we'll get through this.

On that note I'm going to go hook her up to her last feed of the night so I can put the little darling to bed. She has been giving us a hard time about going to bed and wants to watch TV which we haven't allowed in a very long time. We usually just put her music on and she would go to sleep but that hasn't been happening. I don't know if she's starting the terrible 2s or she's just spoiled. I kinda think it might be a little of the first and a lot of the 2nd!